Exclusive: Brock Lesnar re-signs with WWE, proving Ryan Satin is the biggest joke in wrestling

The dangerous thing about completely making up stories for website traffic when you cover wrestling, is that it is a scripted sport, and you can immediately be exposed to be an absolute joke. Unfortunately for Ryan Satin, he became the victim of this EXACT scenario earlier today.

A few hours ago, ESPN announced the news that Brock Lesnar has signed a multi-year contract with the WWE, fresh off the heels of his upset victory over Roman Reigns at WrestleMania last night. All of the wrestling media, including ourselves, were willing to concede that we were brilliantly swerved by the WWE and Paul Heyman, who did a wonderful job of convincing everybody, including WWE employees, that Brock Lesnar was leaving for UFC. Even the UFC’s Dana White was in on the swerve.

However, whilst the rest of the wrestling media applauded the WWE’s efforts, one man decided to fabricate a nonsensical bulls**t story to explain what happened with Lesnar and Reigns. That man was of course, Ryan Satin. Satin created a story insinuating that Lesnar had gone into business for himself and went off script during the finish of the match. He then claimed that Brock Lesnar was furious backstage and threw the WWE Universal Championship in Vince McMahon’s face.

Unfortunately for hapless Ryan, only hours later, ESPN announced the news that Lesnar had re-signed a multi-year deal with the WWE, further killing the credibility of Satin.

Now, people can choose to believe that Brock Lesnar went off script and brutally beat up his fellow employee and then followed this up by throwing a metal object at Vince McMahon’s face, yet, was still rewarded with a multi-year and multi Million Dollar contract, less than 24 hours later….

Or, alternatively….

They can believe that Ryan Satin, who we should now probably refer to as Ryan Satire, is a complete fraud, who made up a story to regain some relevance.

If you are in any way on the fence, I suggest you throw a metal object and your Boss tomorrow, and let me know how it worked out for you.

2 thoughts on “Exclusive: Brock Lesnar re-signs with WWE, proving Ryan Satin is the biggest joke in wrestling

  1. I didn’t know Brock “The Buffet” Lesner would resign with WWE, but I kinda figured he’d win. My guess, assuming he’d leave, was he’d turn it over Monday night on his way out the door.

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