Patreon Exclusive: BAD NEWS for Velveteen Dream fans

So Vince McMahon loves the Velveteen Dream- but for all the wrong reasons.

According to our sources, the Dream has reignited a long time Vince McMahon obsession- to create himself a wrestling version of Little Richard. The last guy he tried to do this with was Wildman Marc Mero. Y’all worried yet?

For those not familiar with Little Richard, he is an American recording artist, singer-songwriter and actor, who was an open voyeur and bi-sexual, often performing in drag.

It’s a well known fact that McMahon has always been a fan of the pop music and culture icon, and even invited him to perform at WrestleMania X. Little Richard’s most-celebrated work dates from the mid-1950s when his dynamic music and charismatic showmanship presaged the rise of rock and roll.

To read the rest of this story, go to:

https://www.patreon.com/posts/22809939

CIA confirm: WWE Business Partner responsible for murder

The CIA has concluded that Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, the man responsible for bringing the WWE to Saudi Arabia, did order the assassination of journalist Jamal Khashoggi in Istanbul last month, contradicting the Saudi government’s claims that he was not involved in the killing.

The CIA’s assessment is the most definitive to date, linking Mohammed to the operation. These findings heavily complicate the Trump administration’s efforts to preserve its relationship with a close ally. It’s also likely to further complicate the WWE’s 10-year deal with the Saudi Sports Authority.

Dave Meltzer is the biggest CON ARTIST in Wrestling

Is anyone seriously still taking this washed-up lying has-been seriously? He hasn’t had a story all year and his new thing is to give a fake fabricated explanation as to why something happened, the day after it happened- while claiming he knew the event in question was happening all along. Therefore, my question is, if this f*cking dipshit knew what was happening, then why didn’t he report it, LIKE WE DID, which you can clearly see at the top of the page or by clicking the Blue link.

Instead, here is what the pathetic no-news fraud had to say:

If anyone still takes this joke of a source seriously in 2018, they probably believe that Star Wars really happened and that Santa is real.

MELTZER IS FINISHED as a credible source! He hasn’t had an informant in years! He’s living off a reputation built in the 80s and 90s, and if anyone is still giving this con-man money, he’s stealing from you, because you are a MORON!!

Don’t be a moron! Unsubscribe from the Observer today! If you put your $11 a month in jar, in one year you will have $132. That should be enough to get yourself a nice escort for an hour at the end of the year- because let’s face it, if you’ve been giving your money to Meltzer, you’re a mark, and you aren’t meeting women any other way.

FDM!

Exclusive: End of Era as Raw overruns to end from tomorrow- We reveal why

Any real wrestling fan will know that Raw never ends on time. This was a tactic both WWE and WCW used in the 90s to try and stay on the air longer than each other and create the feel that wrestling was real, and couldn’t be timed out perfectly. However, from tomorrow night, this tradition will come to an end, as the USA have instructed the WWE to start going off the air by 22.59.

This will come as a relief to many, who have grown tired off tedious 3 hour Raws, feeling the extra 15-20 minutes is completely unnecessary. Raw went to 3 hours on July 23rd 2012. At the time, there was mixed opinions about the move, with fans split about the decision. The WWE promoted the change by airing the hilarious commercial posted below:

Hilarious Commercial for 3 hour Raws

As time has gone on, most fans have grown to dislike the format, crying out for the WWE to drop the show back down to a more digestible 2 hours. That hasn’t quite happened yet, but many will certainly see losing 15 pointless minutes as a positive. The move will also allow fans who watch both the WWE and NFL, to watch the majority of the 4th quarter of the NFL Monday Night game- which is obviously the most significant part of the game.

According to our sources, the decision was made to aid the sitcom Modern Family, which was picked up by the USA Network for a whopping $1.5m per episode, just for syndication (old episodes). In the past, coming on after Raw would aid many programmes, as the USA Network believed that the WWE audience would continue watching the channel. However, based on research and social media activity, the USA Network feel that many fans of the sitcom are tuning out when they see wrestling on TV- with the tune out statistics seemingly outweighing the number of viewers who stay tuned.

Exclusive: Why Brock Lesnar won the Universal Championship

Last Friday at Crown Jewel, Brock Lesnar defeated Braun Strowman for the WWE Universal Championship.

The reasoning behind this is because the WWE are keen to have The Rock defeat Brock Lesnar for the Universal Championship at WrestleMania, and do a rematch between the pair in Saudi Arabia in April. However, if they are unable to secure The Rock, it’ll be Braun Strowman who will defeat Lesnar, and finally take his place as the WWE’s top babyface. The seeds for this were clearly sewn last Friday.

If the WWE don’t secure The Rock, it’s not known if Lesnar vs Strowman if the WWE will go back to Ronda Rousey vs Charlotte Flair. However, we can confirm, that the story put out by Dave Meltzer, about Batista vs Triple H being the planned Main Event, is completely FALSE. Whilst the match WAS pencilled in, it was NEVER considered to Main Event ahead of Rousey vs Charlotte or anything involving The Rock.

Despite the fact that Rousey and Charlotte are still set to face at WrestleMania, that match is no longer the preferred Main Event. To find out why, check out our exclusive story by going to:

https://www.patreon.com/posts/patreon-major-22513564

Raw, SmackDown, WWE, WrestleMania, Wrestling

Patreon Exclusive: Crown Jewel FACTS & rumour killers

You’ve read all the crap written by the con artists and social justice fucktards who cover wrestling, now let’s hit you with the FACTS, given to us by one of our ever reliable sources- because unlike the others, we actually have reliable sources.

Manchester

This story epitomises the sort of crap these so called wrestling writers make up. Moving the event to Manchester hasn’t even been a f*cking conversation the WWE have had. Ths fake date being tossed around is 4th November, the same day Manchester City play Southampton at 3pm in Manchester, making it virtually impossible to pull off, due to the fact that Manchester Police would suddenly need to double the amount of people they employ for just one day, or decide not to Police the WWE event properly- which is never going to happen, especially when you consider that the fact that the event would be held at the MEN, the exact building where the Ariana Grande terrorist attack took place.

This seemed like a fun and logical bullshit story to throw out, but when you look at the FACTS, it’s clear that it was never even suggested. Just your typical fake news piece.

The Michaels and Lesnar situation 

I love seeing idiots blindly writing bullshit like, “they will just move the matches to another show, like Survivor Series or they will change the venue.”

Oh really Dave? Who’s gonna pay Michaels’ and Lesnar’s wages then? You, with the Observer money you’ve made from scamming dumb gullible morons who can’t work out they are being hoodwinked by your dead news?

To read the rest of this story and find out what will really next, including what Lesnar and Michaels are set to be paid, click the link below:

Click HERE to read the FULL story

Exclusive: Saudis make staggering offer for The Rock

The Saudi Arabian influence over WWE booking is about to hit new heights, with a staggering $20m offer for The Rock to appear next April as the WWE Champion.

As reported by The Dirty Sheets many months ago, the WWE are keen to have Roman Reigns vs The Rock at WrestleMania 35. However, The Rock is about go from being offered $4m to appear at WrestleMania, to being offered $24m to do two shows in 3 weeks next April. This could even increase to $26m if The Rock holds on to the Championship in Saudi Arabia and drops the Gold at SummerSlam.

This staggering amount would far surpass anything any wrestler has ever made. Both John Cena and Steve Austin previously had very successful years in the WWE, where both earned over $10m a year, whilst Brock Lesnar has earned over $4m a year throughout his run since his 2012 return. However, nobody has come close to earning over $26m for 3 matches.